Day 7 - Someone who has had the biggest impact on me

I have to admit, I could list a ton of people here. My grandfather, my mother, my best friends, even my son's father (but I'll save him for another day)...yet in the end, I chose the one person in this world I truly can not live without.


Almost 8 years ago, my life changed drastically. Braeden's father and I had been together for a few years at that point, and we had eased into our relationship routine life. The weekend of Martin Luther King, Jr's day in 2003, I had a sinking feeling that something was about to change. Three pregnancy tests later, we had confirmed it...we were having a baby...


I was terrified of having a child. I was the oldest of six kids (through a blended mix), and felt like I had changed more than my share of diapers and trying to calm down crying babies and I wanted to just focus on my career. Nonetheless, life had something else in store for me.




I could tell you a long story about my pregnancy and the troubles that came along with it, but I won't bore you with those details. My sweet boy was due at the end of September, but he decided he couldn't wait and showed up four weeks earlier than expected. My little boy was born weighing 4 lbs 13 oz. I had an emergency c-section and they whisked him away from me almost immediately. I was so groggy from the medication, I barely remember seeing him at that point. Because he was so small, he was hooked up to IV's and they wouldn't bring him to me right away. It was almost 24 hours before they finally brought him to me and then it was all over...My heart was gone...


Becoming a mother did not come easily for me. I struggled with a lot of emotions when he was first born. I loved him immediately but due to many other things happening, I did not get the chance to spend an enormous amount of time with him right away.


When my boy was 2 and a half years old, we had a pretty significant life changing event and suddenly, I was a single parent. Dealing with the fallout of the events of that time and instantaneously becoming the sole person responsible for my son's well being was terrifying. Yet, it gave me that chance to spend all my time with my little boy. Our relationship changed and my baby became the momma's boy that I had dreamed about while pregnant...


Braeden gave me strength to fight through the worst times in my life. I had to keep it together for him. I had to stay strong and provide for him. I wanted to give him a better life and show him that we would make it together...even if all we had was love. He's the reason I wake up every day and see it through. My grandmother told me before he was born that I would never know heartache like I would once my child was born, and oh boy, was she right! Every time he hurts, I wince. Every time his heart breaks, mine does too. When he smiles, I can't help but smile and when he laughs, I feel like we're on top on the world together. He's 7 years old now, and he promises that he'll never leave my side! I realize this won't be the case but I can hope...

Braeden loves Transformers and Star Wars and cars (an increasing fascination with the Ford Mustang...look Mommy, it looks like Geoff's, only it's (insert different color other than black)...). He likes to pretend he is a super secret agent and sometimes tells me that he is his clone and the real Braeden is off doing a spy mission. He wants to join the Air Force when he grows up like his Papaw. He has to hear me sing "You Are My Sunshine" every night before he goes to sleep. He hated learning how to read but now loves it as much as I do. He won't eat anything I cook but will devour whatever Geoff makes him :) He's the sweetest, most loving little boy in the world and he continues to change my life as I learn every day what new challenges we face together in his growing up adventures. The best present I have ever received...my son.