Thirteen
My boy,
Today you turn thirteen. A teenager. I don't know how this happened. Just a few days ago, I was holding you in my arms, overwhelmed at how tiny you were. Panicking at every caught breath or delayed moment of crying. Falling in love with being a mother while the rest of my world was falling apart. I truly believe that God knew I needed you more than anything else that I might have been praying for and he delivered the best thing in the world to me when you were born.
My sweet boy,
You'll probably hate me calling you that for much longer. You already tell me you're practically a man. Slow down for just a minute, ok? I'm doing the best I can to deal with you becoming a teenager, don't push me there yet! There are so many things I want to tell you. So many things I want to show you. And my time with you still needing me is passing way too quickly. So here. Keep this and read this and know how much I have always loved you and how that will never change.
You are such a kind soul. Even when you pretend not to be, you can't help it. You help us function as a family every day, although I do have to pull out the mom is losing it voice on occasion. You pour my iced coffee in a mug every morning to keep me from going on a rampage (haha!). You take care of our sweet but loony dog. You help Mamaw when she needs it at her house, You are always quick to lend a hand (and most of the time without prompting and maybe only minimal grumbling).
You are smart. I am so proud of everything you have achieved with school and your robotics. We showed that dumb first grade teacher that you were better than what she labeled you. She said you would get held back and you leapt ahead of the pack. When I see you working with your robots, I am in awe. I don't understand what you are doing, but you can jump in and build and code and make it do things. I see you learning to be a part of a team. Getting frustrated but trying to keep it together to make it work. You're so much like me, it's a little frightening. You just want it to go the way it is supposed to go. But life doesn't work that way. Don't be as stubborn as I am.
Keep being kind. In the long run, people will appreciate that more than they can express. Keep learning. You are never too old to learn something new. Keep reading. You will never regret the ability to pick up a book and get lost in it. Make the time, even when you grow up and have your own family, to keep enjoying books.
Smile at people. Be a gentleman. Listen. Pay attention to what people say to you but don't take it all to heart. Know your worth. Don't let people tear you down and make you feel like nothing. Someone will always try. But if you continue to be a kind soul, the people who matter will always see who you really are. Keep your heart open to possibilities but don't get caught up by pretty words or faces. And don't lie to people. It's the worst.
Talk to me when something is worrying you. Maybe I can't fix it, but I can always listen. And I promise not to judge (much). I know I can't do everything for you as badly as I may want to, but talking to me helps us both feel better. Even if it's uncomfortable. I'm always here.
Don't give in to peer pressure. No, Not "everyone is doing it". I promise you that. Sorry kiddo, you got the goody two shoes mom who never did anything. So I won't be cool with you trying drugs or drinking as a teenager. You don't need those things. I had a blast with my friends without any of that stuff. You will too. And if someone is pushing you to do any of those, they aren't your friend. Friends will respect your choices. Make good choices. Sure, sometimes you may think it's not big deal because you are still young. But every decision you make has a consequence, good or bad. You are growing up in a time where so much is documented through social media that what you think is silly or harmless may end up haunting you for a very long time. You don't want to become that guy.
I am doing my best to raise you to be a good man, and a good person. I'm going to fail sometimes. I'm going to say or do the wrong thing. Just try to remember that every decision since you were born has been made to create the best life for you. You are my reason for everything. You are my sunshine (I can't believe how much I miss singing this to you every night when I used to wish for the day I wouldn't have to do it any more). I love you Braeden. Happy Birthday!!!!!!
Today you turn thirteen. A teenager. I don't know how this happened. Just a few days ago, I was holding you in my arms, overwhelmed at how tiny you were. Panicking at every caught breath or delayed moment of crying. Falling in love with being a mother while the rest of my world was falling apart. I truly believe that God knew I needed you more than anything else that I might have been praying for and he delivered the best thing in the world to me when you were born.
My sweet boy,
You'll probably hate me calling you that for much longer. You already tell me you're practically a man. Slow down for just a minute, ok? I'm doing the best I can to deal with you becoming a teenager, don't push me there yet! There are so many things I want to tell you. So many things I want to show you. And my time with you still needing me is passing way too quickly. So here. Keep this and read this and know how much I have always loved you and how that will never change.
You are such a kind soul. Even when you pretend not to be, you can't help it. You help us function as a family every day, although I do have to pull out the mom is losing it voice on occasion. You pour my iced coffee in a mug every morning to keep me from going on a rampage (haha!). You take care of our sweet but loony dog. You help Mamaw when she needs it at her house, You are always quick to lend a hand (and most of the time without prompting and maybe only minimal grumbling).
You are smart. I am so proud of everything you have achieved with school and your robotics. We showed that dumb first grade teacher that you were better than what she labeled you. She said you would get held back and you leapt ahead of the pack. When I see you working with your robots, I am in awe. I don't understand what you are doing, but you can jump in and build and code and make it do things. I see you learning to be a part of a team. Getting frustrated but trying to keep it together to make it work. You're so much like me, it's a little frightening. You just want it to go the way it is supposed to go. But life doesn't work that way. Don't be as stubborn as I am.
Keep being kind. In the long run, people will appreciate that more than they can express. Keep learning. You are never too old to learn something new. Keep reading. You will never regret the ability to pick up a book and get lost in it. Make the time, even when you grow up and have your own family, to keep enjoying books.
Smile at people. Be a gentleman. Listen. Pay attention to what people say to you but don't take it all to heart. Know your worth. Don't let people tear you down and make you feel like nothing. Someone will always try. But if you continue to be a kind soul, the people who matter will always see who you really are. Keep your heart open to possibilities but don't get caught up by pretty words or faces. And don't lie to people. It's the worst.
Talk to me when something is worrying you. Maybe I can't fix it, but I can always listen. And I promise not to judge (much). I know I can't do everything for you as badly as I may want to, but talking to me helps us both feel better. Even if it's uncomfortable. I'm always here.
Don't give in to peer pressure. No, Not "everyone is doing it". I promise you that. Sorry kiddo, you got the goody two shoes mom who never did anything. So I won't be cool with you trying drugs or drinking as a teenager. You don't need those things. I had a blast with my friends without any of that stuff. You will too. And if someone is pushing you to do any of those, they aren't your friend. Friends will respect your choices. Make good choices. Sure, sometimes you may think it's not big deal because you are still young. But every decision you make has a consequence, good or bad. You are growing up in a time where so much is documented through social media that what you think is silly or harmless may end up haunting you for a very long time. You don't want to become that guy.
I am doing my best to raise you to be a good man, and a good person. I'm going to fail sometimes. I'm going to say or do the wrong thing. Just try to remember that every decision since you were born has been made to create the best life for you. You are my reason for everything. You are my sunshine (I can't believe how much I miss singing this to you every night when I used to wish for the day I wouldn't have to do it any more). I love you Braeden. Happy Birthday!!!!!!
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