Finding Krista

This past week, I drove to my old high school, my son in the front passenger seat sneaking a sip of my iced caramel coffee, before pulling into the parking lot and finding a spot in the aisle next to the one where I had my designated parking place as a Senior way back in 1995-1996.  I checked my purse one last time to make sure I had the forms and adequate proof of residency and we walked towards the back of the school where lines were forming.  A young girl asked me if I'd dropped off my registration paperwork yet and I said no, so she directed us to one of the lines.  And there I was.  Walking back into the cafeteria where we had our Junior Achievement meetings once a week.  Where I'd hung out with friends and crushed on boys and frantically tried to finish assignments before the next class.  The spot where they had set us up for Senior pictures,  Where we filled out paper forms to choose the homecoming court each year.  And four years of memories flooded my brain. But the

My boy, Today you turn thirteen.  A teenager.  I don't know how this happened.  Just a few days ago, I was holding you in my arms, overwhelmed at how tiny you were.  Panicking at every caught breath or delayed moment of crying.  Falling in love with being a mother while the rest of my world was falling apart.  I truly believe that God knew I needed you more than anything else that I might have been praying for and he delivered the best thing in the world to me when you were born. My sweet boy, You'll probably hate me calling you that for much longer.  You already tell me you're practically a man.  Slow down for just a minute, ok?  I'm doing the best I can to deal with you becoming a teenager, don't push me there yet!  There are so many things I want to tell you.  So many things I want to show you.  And my time with you still needing me is passing way too quickly.  So here.  Keep this and read this and know how much I have always loved you and how that will nev

"There are no coincidences in life.  What person that wondered in and out of your life was there for some purpose, even if they caused you hard.  Sometimes, it doesn't make sense the short periods of time we get with people, or the outcomes from their choices.  However, if you turn it over to God he promises that you will see the big picture in the hereafter.  Nothing is too small to be a mistake." - Shannon L. Alder I know.  It's been forever.  I'd apologize but the past year was a little rough and so far 2015 isn't seeming any easier.  I'm thankful for the good things in my life, I really am.  But I wish there were just a few more things to ease me through it all. And that brief paragraph does nothing to explain the title of this blog, or the quote I've posted in the beginning.  So let me try. If you know me, and I'm sure you do if you are reading this - I guarantee that this isn't about who you first think it might be.  Related, yes.  

You know what sucks?  Trying to find cute clothes that fit my body.  I'm an extra curvy girl with boobs and a smaller waistline, so things that fit on top don't necessarily fit me on the bottom.  Not to regurgitate what every other blog about fashion says, but it's really hard finding cute, stylish clothes in my size.  Now I'm pretty proud of the fact that at my heaviest I wore a size 22 and I am down to a pretty solid 16 (sometimes 14 when I can discipline myself to eat better and do more exercising).  Still, I'm not a mainstream size, especially at the bust line.  I do a lot of online window shopping and since computers are evil beings that track what you search for, I started getting Facebook ads for a site called Gwynnie Bee .  I ignored them at first, as I do most ads, but one day they had a really cute dress on the ad and I thought, ok I'll check this out.   They offer a free 30 day trial of 1,2, or 3 items out at a time so I signed up.  Since I want to do

I've seen a few posts online where people are complaining about the New Year Resolution people who go to the gym for a week and then quit and how they're looking forward to getting their gym back.   This pisses me off.  I'm not skinny.  I've never been skinny.  But a few years ago I did make an effort to become a healthier woman.  I lost some weight and I've mostly maintained that loss.  But I haven't been great at the maintenance.  So I look at the new year as a chance to start over.  Wash it away and say, this year I'm going to try harder.  This might mean that I finally decided to use my gym membership that comes with my health insurance plan.  But if you look at me with derision, like I'm taking up your valuable space at "your" gym, then yeah, I'm probably not going to be inclined to come back after a week or so.  So maybe instead of being a smug a-hole about "your" gym, you should try and encourage that person who resolved

Welcome to 2014. 2013 was a hell of a year.  Not a great one, but not the worst year ever.  I had my share of ups and downs.  I had a tiny (massive) freak out at the beginning of last year because I kept feeling like I was supposed to set all of these goals and make shit happen, when in reality, all I wanted was to find a little peace.   And so, in my own little way, I did.  I finished a Goodreads challenge, which I started at 150 books, then as I realized I was going to smash through that pretty quickly, I re-set to 365.  I ended the year with a documented 375 books.  That's only the books I logged in as completed.  I read more, but I chose not to include short stories or novellas.  If it only took me 15 minutes to read it, it didn't make the log.  I'm doing it again this year and I may write about some of those here if the mood strikes. I didn't spend as much time as I wanted to with the boyfriend, but I did get three weeks with him.  I spent Spring Break playin